My name is Matthew and I am an alcoholic.
Before coming into Alcoholics Anonymous my life was full of resentments and fear. I was unclear of how I was living my life and why I was so unhappy. I lived my life isolating in blackout and drinking to calm my head and my thoughts. I had no control of my life and when I drank, I had no control of my actions or the consequences.
I lived in a flat with no gas, electricity and my debts were knocking on the door.
I had no way out. All I had was loneliness, fear and the cold sense of dying alone.
I tried AA before but never stayed sober long enough to listen.
This time when I came into A.A, I went to what is now my home group (Road to Recovery, Plymouth). It was a Tuesday evening, and I was greeted by happy, content and smart individuals. They made me feel welcome and I listened to the shares from the floor. I left with hope and wanted to attend another meeting and I never thought about a drink that night. I wanted what they had. I was told “do what we have done”. I got a sponsor and was given small daily actions and worked through the 12 Steps.
My life transformed beyond my own ideas, I was given peace and serenity and my head slept at night.
My partner asked me to marry him after my Step 9. I got married in recovery and had fellows from my home group attend and my sponsor took our photos. I paid off my debts and saved for a mortgage, my husband and I brought our first home in my first year. I have learnt to drive and have a driving license. I have changed careers and been promoted at my job.
Been on holidays and never once thought about a drink.
My husband and I are in the process of adoption.
I give back into A.A service and take full responsibility for all the service I do and take it seriously. I get to at least three meetings a week and continue to give back as best way I know how.
This is a small price to pay for the life I have today and a small price to pay for anyone who wants to enjoy peace of mind and a life beyond their limitations.
I will always be in debt to A.A and my home group and will always give back as best as I know how.
Matthew W, Road to Recovery Group, Plymouth.