Doing Things I Don't Want to Do
I am writing this article not because I want to, but because I ought to. Not very laudable, you might say, but at least it’s a step up from ‘because I have to’. Now what, you might ask, has put me in this middling frame of mind? Well, life basically. Now, anyone with any experience of AA knows that I have a plethora of spiritual tools at my disposal for dealing with ‘life’. But, sometimes life is, well, just that. What to do?
Usually, although it’s a strain, I will try to do something I don’t want to do – hence this article. Time after time I have had to remind myself that the solution to low spots in recovery is action. Maybe I am so flat, mentally and emotionally, that I can’t muster much action. Never mind, at times like this Bill suggested starting with the ‘irreducible minimum’ and then working for an enlargement of these activities. Just a bit of positive action is all that is required for a change to be effected in my thinking. Pretty soon I am able to turn my thoughts to helping others – ‘ah, yes, those other alcoholics’.
You could say, of course, that I started writing this piece to help myself. And you’d be right. Other people weren’t on my radar a few short lines ago. But now they are! As I look up from this computer screen at my modest collection of AA books and the picture of my wife I can hear daughter No.2 keeping the water meter ticking over in the bathroom, and I realise yet again that I never had it so good.
Did I say that I am writing this article not because I want to, but because I ought to? Whatever – I’m just glad that I did.
Jon F, Road to Recovery Group Plymouth