I started going to meetings over ten years ago now. There was a lot of talk about God, Higher Powers and also a lot of talk around the 12 steps. I continued to go back to that meeting, and the group I went to highly recommended getting a sponsor. So I thought it was a good idea to get one. I found a sponsor who seemed very happy and a gentle man. I was able to just start seeing how powerless I was over alcohol and how unmangeable my thinking had become. I started to realize and accept that everytime I tried to have a drink, I was unable to control the amount that I had. As soon as I had a drink I have a craving for more. I started to learn and understand how sick my thinking had become, through many years of drinking. I started to read and understand about the first two steps. The second step says that we came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. I had had a faith in my life from a child but it faded with my alcoholism. I only relied on God when things got very bad. I was keen to recover from alcoholism and I knew that what it was going to take to recover was the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. I got to the point where I wanted more in the way of recovery and then I made a decision to turn my will over to the care of God. The way that I actually did this was that I got together with my sponsor and I got on my knees and said the step 3 prayer.
I felt quite uplifted afterwards. I really started to think that this was really a new beginning. My mind started to feel less full. I started to understand that my life had nothing to do with me anymore. It was time to surrender. I started to realise that all my life of running on self-will had led to decisions that had led to heartache, resentment and the Gates of Hell, banging on the bar asking for another drink as the craving took a hold.
Through doing suggestions I kept connected to God and kept that channel open. I continue to work with alcoholics regulary, keep in contact with my sponsor, read my Big Book and try and do all I can for my home group. All these things take me away from my self-will and help me to feel closer to God. Without putting in any of the actions I'm led back on my own will which always leads to misery.
I would highly recommend going through the 12 steps to anyone. It's what keeps me sober and happy . I have been sober for over 12 years and my life continues to improve and becomes full of more and more happiness as time goes on.